Most of us want that outside “fix” – something to numb, heal, or resolve the hurt and pain we might be carrying. Old news, right? Well, the outside solution certainly has appeal, particularly because it absolves us of having to take responsibility for tending to our own wounds, and this tendency can transfer over into our relationships too. We can be guilty of looking to the people in our lives to do this for us, and more so if we feel they are the reason we feel the way we do. It’s a bit like feeling badly for eating that huge piece of X and then helping ourselves to another piece of X to make us feel better!
We can decide to bring our hurt to the table with someone, but unless we have taken time to console ourselves and nurture that hurt, we will only show up as hungry children. And we will likely leave as hungry children. Why? Because no one can give us what we can only give ourselves.
If we decide we need to vocalize our feelings to another, it needs to be for us, not in the hopes that our hurt will propel another to change his or her behaviour. It’s actually about boundaries, deciding what’s acceptable and what we will and will not allow in our lives. Once we’ve decided what’s acceptable, it does not matter if the other person changes or not — what matters is that we have. We are only ever responsible for ourselves and we are all capable of stepping up and providing ourselves with the inner love and nurturing we all seek and need. From this place, the onus stays on us to look after us, not on expecting the other person to change and magically heal our wounds.
These cupcakes changed the preconceived vegan notions of the non-vegan eating variety of folk this weekend. They were, simply put, to die for. I just love lemon, and these cupcakes take lemon all the way home, but not before stopping at the local corner store for some fresh raspberry coulis to round out that tartness of the lemon union. I’ve also come to the conclusion that when baking for vegan neophytes, it’s best to stick with all-purpose flour (and not venture into spelt territory) and try to hit the baking as close to “home” as possible. For this, I turned to the PPK folk, who I’ve officially deemed the vegan dessert masters. This one comes out of Vegan with Vengeance. The Raspberry Coulis is based off a Dreena recipe from Eat, Drink and Be Vegan. Enjoy!
Lemon Gem Cupcakes
1 1/3 cup all-purpose flour
1/2 tsp baking powder
3/4 tsp baking soda
1/4 tsp salt
1/4 cup canola oil
2/3 cup + 2 tbsp sugar (I used non-refined)
1 cup rice milk (I used soy)
1 tsp vanilla extract
1/4 cup lemon juice
1 tbsp lemon zest.
Pre-heat over to 350, line muffin tins. Sift together dry ingredients. In a large bowl, mix together the wet (including the zest). Add the dry to the wet and mix until smooth. Fill each muffin cup 2/3 full or so. [I did this and had leftover batter, with which I made a pineapple upside down cake, but that’s for another post!). Bake 17-20 minutes and let cool completely before frosting.
1/4 cup earth balance margarine
1/4 cup soy
2 tbsp lemon juice
2 cups icing sugar
Use a hand mixer and mix until fluffy. Store in fridge until ready to use.
Mix 1 tbsp arrowroot powder with 1/4 cup water. Bring 1 cup of raspberries to a boil, adding arrowroot mixture and 1/4 cup agave. Simmer on low heat until thickened, about 4 minutes (until raspberries collapse a bit). Spoon over cupcakes right before serving.