What if I told you that we never really “make it?” That we are in a constant process of building ourselves up, only to see ourselves crumble down – and each time we must strengthen the foundation, reassemble the pieces, and have another go at it. That perfect place, that “there” that so many of us yearn for in our concept of healing maybe doesn’t exist like we imagine it does.
Let’s face it – we aren’t perfect. If we hold a perfect ideal of what healing looks like and hold ourselves to high standards of perfection (Perfectionism? High standards? Moi?), but of course we will fall. And the higher the standards, the higher the fall. The only thing that changes is the distance we fall and the manner in which we reassemble ourselves when we do.
To this end, we have a few choices. We can keep placing ourselves back up on that high ledge of perfection, try to hide our cracks and evidence of the reassembly repair work (and be harder and harder on ourselves for not being “there” yet). Or, we can be humbled when we fall. We can let our cracks show. We can put ourselves back together with loving kindness and self forgiveness and be proud of our journey. And as we keep going in this way, the distance from us to the ground decreases, and our falls become less and less devastating as time goes by. I’ll take option number two please! Frankly I just can’t deal with the whole perfection thing anymore – it’s way too much effort, and at the end of the day, I just want to be me. And eat yummy coconut custard with fresh berries (see below).
This one is easy! I know summer is rolly-pollying itself away, but here’s one last token dessert to ease the transition. And hey, who’s to say this couldn’t be a pumpkin pie topping? Right? Hey? Yeah?
Coconut Custard and Fresh Berries
One can of coconut milk, frozen. Scoop out the creamy fat part that rises to the top
Vanilla bean from one pod (or 1 tsp extract)
¼ cup agave (or to taste)
Pinch of sea salt
½ tsp arrowroot powder dissolved in ¼ cup of hot water (let cool) – omit this if you want a runnier custard.
Add the above to a blender and whiz until combined. Keep in the fridge until it’s dessert time, then layer over your favourite fruit in pretty glasses. Toast some dried coconut in a frying pan until brown, then sprinkle on top if so desired. Serves two greedily or four modestly.