These last few months for me have been filled with change and uncertainty–or perhaps more eloquently put, ambiguity. Sitting with ambiguity is really just another exercise in sitting with our feelings. Like a lot of the feelings we try so hard to avoid, ambiguity can be uncomfortable. We may find ourselves confronting feelings of low self worth, questioning our purpose, and being overtaken by fear–all wrapped up in a nice little package of existential angst. We might see this angst reflected in our relationship with food as our defenses against old thought patterns and behaviours are weakened by our shaky footing. So what do we hold on to when everything is in flux?
The answer to this question is different for everyone. For me, my constant is my daily yoga and meditation practice. I make sure I do that EVERY DAY, even if it’s just for 15 minutes if that’s all I can squeeze in. I also find myself turning to gratitude and prayer. I give thanks for all that I am blessed with in my life, and I pray that the direction forward be made clear and that the means to proceed be provided. Some days when I really struggle, I have found myself praying for a miracle! And then I try to let go and trust (the operative word being TRY–often easier said than done).
The older I get the more I realize that life really is just a tap dance around a lot of moving pieces. We go through periods of stability, waves of change, and plunges into the unknown. Through it all, however, I also know that we always come out okay on the other side–at least so far I have. What is your “constant” in times of uncertainty and transition?
On the plus side, somethings never change and that includes my love for yummy nourishing foodstuffs. I have not cooked a single thing on the stove all summer long. In fact, I don’t even know what I’m eating most days but I can tell you it involves a lot of all things fresh, and a lot of KALE. This is just one such lovely event that made its way onto my table: a spinach salad topped with candied walnuts, granny smith apple shards, aged white cheddar cubes, and dried cranberries. It really doesn’t get much better than that! PS. Please forgive the out-of-focus photo: hunger + camera phone. Nuff said.